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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Write in the POETRY genre (05/17/07)

TITLE: Feathering My Empty Nest
By Donna Emery
05/19/07


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No one to take out to the bus stop
No one’s dirty socks on the floor
No one whose loud music annoys me
No one comes, too late, through the door.

For twenty-two years I’ve been busy
I’ve struggled as a single mom
For so long my thoughts and my actions
Have been centered on Ricky and Tom.

But Tom moved last year, to Nebraska
He and Susan bought their little farm
And Ricky just left for his college
I pray that he won’t come to harm.

But once my boys left, I was lonely
I felt so alone and unsure.
I’d longed for the peace and the quiet
Yet it proved too intense to endure.

So I prayed and asked God, “Help me cope now
Please help Your Love my heart to fill
Though I have friends and work, I feel lonely
And long to be used for Your Will.”

So, the Lord showed me folks in the Body
Who are lonely like I am, and need
A hand, or a friend, or a list’ner
As He shows me, His guidance I heed.

So I take Joy’s son out to the bus stop
And vacuum the rugs for Philippe
Maurice tuned my Chevy, last Tuesday
I’ve watched Kate’s kids, so she could sleep.

I took Mary to see her doctor
I cooked meals when Don’s father died
Anne listened, when I had a problem
And when Jayne lost her husband, we cried.

For God sets the lonely in families
He gives our deep longings a voice
I thank God for sending me purpose
And I treasure my “family of choice”.

Based on Psalms 68:6a: “God sets the lonely in families”


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This article has been read 839 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Jacquelyn Horne05/24/07
Beautiful. I loved this. God will provide if we let him.
Edy T Johnson 05/24/07
Your title was the first to grab me, out of all four levels! And, the sentiments of your poem (built around one of my favorite scripture verses) are truly beautiful. Only a couple spots in the rhythm could be smoothed and this is ready for publishing.
Marilee Alvey05/24/07
This poem spoke to me, in my empty nest. It feels like you work so hard and fast, only to work yourself out of a job. As you point out, though, there are many opportunities out there. I think it's so important that we not keep our service just for our own. That's easy. But can you love others, not in your family? Thanks for the reminder that we have a much larger family to care for: God's family!
Rhonda Clark 05/25/07
Wonderful. I love this. It shows what we can do. Great job.
Benjamin Graber05/25/07
Neat title, Bible verse, and poem to match both! I'm glad God has given you chances to serve the big family!
One thought for critique: watch your rhymes; some of them sounded a little forced. Try to use unexpected rhymes instead of common ones.
Keep up the good work!
Verna Cole Mitchell 05/25/07
This is a poem of deep meaning and message. You did a great job.
Sharlyn Guthrie05/25/07
I love the heart you revealed in this piece and the encouragement to all to get out there and get involved. Thanks for sharing.
Mo 05/25/07
Very nice!
Julie Arduini05/26/07
Great title and testimony of His provision and faithfulness. This would have made a great story as well, but it works with the poetry genre nicely.
Sandra Petersen 05/28/07
Though I haven't experienced the empty nest yet, your poem made me think of the times I HAVE felt lonely and alone.

There were a few metrical blips here and there, but the rhyme scheme was good and the message was clear.

I really liked these stanzas:
"So I take Joy’s son out to the bus stop
And vacuum the rugs for Philippe
Maurice tuned my Chevy, last Tuesday
I’ve watched Kate’s kids, so she could sleep.

I took Mary to see her doctor
I cooked meals when Don’s father died
Anne listened, when I had a problem
And when Jayne lost her husband, we cried."
The first one was especially nice being a mirror of the opening stanza but with a happier view! Thanks for sharing!
Rita Garcia05/30/07
I really enjoyed this! I thought the last verse pictured a peacefulness in Him.
dub W05/30/07
Our empty nest keeps getting refilled. A good heart felt poem. Well done.
Joanne Sher 05/30/07
I've never noticed this verse before, and I LOVE it! I'm far from the empty nest, but this felt so accurate and wonderful. Excellent.
Patty Wysong05/30/07
I really like this one! ;-) Hugs!
Betty Castleberry05/30/07
I really liked this. It is unique among the poems I've read, and totally unexpected. Love the message. Very well done.
Leigh MacKelvey05/30/07
Oh, Donna ... Your poem meant so much to me. I'm an empty nester after being a single mom . Yes, a few meter errors, but who cares! Not I! The message was so meaniful and heartfelt. One of my favorite poems!
william price05/30/07
Great job, super reader involvement. I identified all the way through. God bless.
Janice Fitzpatrick06/18/07
Ok, agan I am requesting kleenex please as the tears are filling my eyes. Hon,this is so beautiful and so true. You have to get this into some magazine or booklet even with a devotional along with it for married and single moms. I have been both places in my life and could totally relate to this. Isn't God s good in how He helps fill our time with blessings and ways to bless others. Wow. Thx so much Donna. Lord bless you in every way and your writing. Janice