Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: Write in the HUMOR genre (04/12/07)
TITLE: “QUAD-RADICALLY CHALLENGED”
By Donna Haug
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SUBJECT: Quad-radically Challenged
Hey, Michelle. Whassup? Are you having fun in Florida? You won’t believe what happened to me this week.
It was bad enough that my parents had to decide to re-live the good old days in WINNIPEG on our March Break. I mean, come on! There are no beaches in Winnipeg. After two full days in the back seat of a car, we finally arrived to find knee-deep snow everywhere. I won’t be getting a tan.
“I knew you when you were this big.” If I hear that again, I’ll scream! Mom and Dad had loads of fun visiting with all their old friends. Like as if I’m going to remember anything from when I was 3 months old! Get real. But, with all their hanging out with their old friends, I did get to meet lots of new kids. For the most part, it was fun.
I was getting a little tired of playing with the younger kids I had been staying with all week. I was bored and wanted to go shopping or something. But, no! We had to go visit someone else.
Anyway, we arrived at Uncle Walter’s house. (He’s not my real uncle, but you know …) We went into the house, and you won’t believe what greeted us. SEVEN big golden retrievers came bounding across the living room towards us. I have never seen so many dogs in a house before. Grandma would have a fit! I loved it. I took them out to play in the snow.
A while later, Dad and Uncle Walter called me out to the front. “Hey, how would you like to try out the snowmobile?”
Who, me? I had never even been close to one of those before. It sure looked like fun. Uncle Walter showed me how it all worked. Then he said, “Climb on. You can take it for a ride.” I guess he thought I knew what I was doing. I tell you, Michelle, it wasn’t two minutes later I had stalled the thing and gotten it hung up in a ditch!
Well, Uncle Walter must have felt that the snowmobile might need a little break. He called me over to his big garage. “Come over here. I’ve got something to show you.” As we walked into the garage, I just stared. Lining the walls, there were tables and shelves covered with tools and dusty jars of stuff. There, parked at the side of the garage, sat a huge blue quad. I had never seen one of those before either.
Uncle Walter must have figured my snowmobile incident was just a freak of nature. Little did he know that I was the freak of nature! With complete faith and confidence in me, he showed me how to accelerate and brake. “Go ahead. Hop on. You can ride it around the yard for a while.”
My stomach was a fruit salad of excitement and fear as I climbed on. I did as he said and the engine roared to life. It was so loud. Pressing the buttons as he had shown me, I felt the quad inch ahead.
“Give it a bit more gas,” Uncle Walter called.
Michelle, you won’t believe what happened next. That stupid thing lurched forward like a roaring dragon. It freaked me right out. I tried to stop it, but I guess I pressed the wrong thing. It just went faster and ran straight up the wall! The shelf full of jars went flying. Meanwhile, I thought the quad was going to flip right over. I jumped off and stood there hanging onto it, but wanting to run away and hide. Uncle Walter ran to my rescue. I don’t know if I felt more scared or ashamed or relieved that I had not hurt myself. He set the quad on its four wheels and carefully turned off the engine. My legs were shaking like Jello. Seriously. My hands shook. Uncle Walter just looked at me as if I had three heads. I guess he’s never met anyone quite so inept when it comes to mechanical creatures. He said, “Maybe you want to go back inside and sit down for a bit.”
Yeah, maybe! I’ll show you pictures of our trip when I get back.
By the way, don’t forget - one more year until we get our driver’s licenses! YES! I can’t wait!
Anyway, gtg. Later!
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