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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Write in the HUMOR genre (04/12/07)

TITLE: Countryside Chronicles
By Laurie Glass
04/15/07


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I grew up on a dairy farm and Iím grateful for that experience. However, thereís something I donít understand. Why is it that city folks think we who live in the country lead a boring life? Perhaps theyíve never read the Countryside Chronicles. If they had, theyíd certainly realize we have excitement all our own out here in the sticks.

In Neighborhood News the other day, Richard Landon reported his neighbor Alton Johnsonís cows got out again and scared off Richardís chickens. It took the rest of the day to gather the chickens back and Richard charged Alton 20 bales of hay for all the trouble his cows caused. We donít need to get the police involved around here.

The Garden Greens section often has interesting pictures and they were especially fascinating this week since we just had our county fair. Sally Olson entered a green bean that was 15 inches long and got a merit award. Her cousin, Johnny, received a merit award for a potato shaped like a dinosaur. You think Iím making this up, but trust me, weíre wild about unique produce around here.

Dick Grenshaw made it on the front page this week for winning the hay bale stacking contest for the third consecutive year. Whoever stacks the most hay bales, three rows high, in 20 minutes wins. And, if you look at the picture real close, you can see the disgusted look on Manley Larsonís face. He came in second two years in a row and around these parts, we all know how Manley doesnít like to be second in anything.

The Haneyís had a close call last week when their 10 year old daughter, Emma, nearly drowned while swimming in the oat bin. When will these kids learn they canít swim in oat bins filled higher than their necks?

I read in the Exciting Events section that our annual Wild West Days celebration is coming up soon. There will be a rodeo, hog wrestling, stagecoach rides and even an all horse-drawn parade. There will be a variety of horses pulling the mayorís carriage, covered wagons, stagecoaches, an old-time funeral hearse and more. Move over Macyís Thanksgiving Day parade, here we come.

See, we have news, entertainment, and exciting moments out here. Shoot, I know we need cities and all they have to offer, but I rather like going to sleep in silence than to the sound of airplanes overhead. I prefer feeling safe and living where I donít have to look over my shoulder - well except when Iím in town the same time as Billy. Just when I least expect it, heís likely to come up behind me, scoop me up and take me on a hay ride. Anyway, maybe my life isnít fast-paced, but Iím never bored. I breathe in fresh air, listen to the birds sing, walk contentedly through the fields, and I smile every day.


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This article has been read 803 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Beth Muehlhausen04/19/07
Cute! I especially liked the 15" bean - lol. I think I grew some pole beans once that were longer than the average bush bean, but that takes the cake!

Light and fun reading, and reminiscent of the good old days. :-)
James Wood04/19/07
Honest, but a little plain. If your point is to exaggerate the simple but happy lifestyle of countryfolk, I would suggest putting in something to contrast it effectively.
Julie Arduini04/20/07
This brings back funny memories to not that I live in a city. One weekly paper I used to get would have front page news if the cows got out. You catured this well. Good job.
Rita Garcia04/20/07
Oh, this is sooo funny! You certainly have a way with words!
Sara Harricharan 04/20/07
I love that last line with smiling every day. That was a great way to end a great piece. This could be part of a morning devotion, maybe with a theme for being thankful or seeing past the ordinary in everday life. Good job with bringing this to life. ^_^
Verna Cole Mitchell 04/20/07
Thanks for a good dose of "folksy" humor.
Jacquelyn Horne04/23/07
Exciting life of country folk. You painted a good picture. Good job.
Linda Watson Owen04/25/07
Oh, this is so cute! I felt like I was back in my childhood on my best friend's dairy farm in Indiana. So true and so delightful!
william price04/26/07
Reminded me of home. Loved it. I'll save this to read when I'm feeling blue. Great wordsmithing. God bless.
Edy T Johnson 06/09/07
Now, how did the judges miss this? I love it! From childhood days, I know those rural weekly newspaper reports, and I'm also at home in the city. Your sly humor is just perfect to show the difference, and the amusing contrasts. Your writing makes me homesick for the joys of the countryside! Delightful reading!
Pam Carlson-Hetland06/13/07
I agree with Edy. This is absolutely delightful. I was born into a family of farmers, I could really relate. It was a like a visit to my childhood home. You definitely have a way with words.