The Official Writing Challenge
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03/08/07
I like the analogy. Well written. Thank you and God bless.
03/10/07
This was a showcase of talented description. You could set up shop teaching this! Ahhh....the emptiness of a commecial Christmas. The ending was poignant, as well. Good job!
03/11/07
Amazing! I love your subtle use of alliteration here and there, and your spot-on characterization of commercial Christmas. And when I got to the reason for the discounted manger scene, it literally took my breath away. How you could put such depth of meaning into 3 short words!
The descritptions ... ahhh ...
such delight!
I felt drab and frustrated along with the shoppers. You showed hiw Jesus was missing in well chosen words!
Your descriptions are beautiful! They took me right into the shop. I especially like your descriptions using alliteration, and you brought home a powerful point as well.
Love the colorful writing in this story. Love the pov of the missing Jesus. Good example.
03/12/07
This is very good, and an all too real portrayal of Christmas in our society. Nice job.
03/12/07
I loved the alliteration and the message. Very well written. Thought provoking. Good job!
03/12/07
Great insight, and your message is one to be taken to heart. Creative take on the topic, and well written.
03/13/07
Just when I thought you couldn't hammer the point any further, you wrote "Jesus is missing". The perfect image, for such a sad editorial. I also felt the baby crying line was beyond superb. You are a true blessing Ann Grover, who ever you are:) I might quit writing here one day, but I will never stop coming back to read your work. God bless.
03/13/07
Your description is masterfully vivid, as always - and an amazing lesson as well. Wonderful.
03/13/07
This is definitely masterful writing. The descriptions are perfect, the tone of the piece is terrific, and the introduction of the title was breathtaking.
Having said all of that, and reminding myself of your masterful writing and you of how much I like this, I thought you should have left the nativity set on the shelf, as it symbolized the place and belonged there with Jesus Missing.
03/13/07
Ooh! I liked this. You did a great job with capturing the bustle and fast-pace of holiday shopping. I liked the bit with the princess on a bicycle and the kid on the skateboard, a hilarious but realistic touch. The ending was like honey-ginger tea. Sweet and mild, with a little kick after you swallow. Great writing! ^_^
I think this is the best I've read this week! Poetically written with a powerful meaning!
03/14/07
Excellent descriptions, and I am one who likes to visualize the scene in my mind as I read, not focus on action and dialogue. Beautiful way of conveying a timeless message, appropriate really, if we were honest, at any time of the year: Jesus is missing.
Totally relate ...too many Christmases I've felt the same. Great story telling. thanks
03/14/07
That was definitely spot on for the way I feel as I shop at Christmastime. Jesus IS missing. Congrats on a very nicely written piece. Blessings, Jo
03/14/07
Loved your piece. Christams is such a magical time I felt it while reading your article--thanks for making Jesus a part of it.
Your story is a true portrait of the Christmas season. You captured it well. Nice job!
03/14/07
I just loved this. The message is spot on without being overpowering. The descriptions are breathtaking. You took this theme and ran with it, great job!
03/15/07
Perfect!
03/15/07
Congratulations on your Highly Commended! ^_^