I’m off to do my shopping
No coin do I possess
For what I plan to purchase
I’ll get when I confess
No crime has been committed
No guilt doth riddle me
And everything I want and need
Is absolutely free.
You do not have to buy one now
To get the other free
You do not have to purchase two
In hopes of getting three.
The one you see is not the last
It’s not one of a kind
It’s meant for everyone to have
Without waiting in line!
It will not break nor will it shrink
Nor will it fade away
It fits you just the same right now
As is it did yesterday.
To return it would be foolish
Who would want to give it back?
A purchase that makes up for
everything you lack.
One size fits all Spring, Summer Fall
And yes in Winter too.
There isn’t any season
Where this purchase wouldn’t do.
And yes, you guessed it, genderless
You can share it with your spouse
And shop at home, without your phone
You’ll never leave your house.
“But where you,” you say, “should I pay?
It’s too good to be true.”
The price is free, just as I said,
He gave His life for you.
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