The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 942 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
03/12/07
Yikes! This read like an action movie. It kept me right there all the way through. One thing, though .. I didn't quite understand it. Was the reader supposed to know what the design was and why it was wanted? I really enjoyed your obvious mature writing skills, but I wanted to know why that design was so important! Don't worry, I never really understand action movies!
03/14/07
Hey, Dub--you know I love your writing, always have, and I think it's cool that you experiment every week. I gotta say: I don't get this. Guess it's too early in the morning, or my brain is fried, waiting for spring break.

It was fun to pick out the cliches, though. Hope you enjoyed your Pepsi and biscuit.
03/14/07
Your first paragraph leaves enough intrigue to keep me reading.

For some reason I really loved this sentence: "I bought the truck off of a hot rodder; a young jackrabbit who had pulled the engine only to replace it with a Corvette block." I could picture the 'young jackrabbit', probably with a cap worn backwards.

Wonderful suspense written throughout this. I ended up wanting to know more, but am content with what you gave me. Good action, great way of foiling the clandestine buyer. You are a Master in my view.
03/14/07
Very interesting! While we only have a small piece of the story, it was still very engaging. I loved this: “I had to pray, cause I had long since lost my ability to swear.”
Very clever exit strategy with the email, and I had to laugh at the code, “just hit delete.”
03/14/07
I like the twist on this. Reminds me of an old John Wayne movie. The touch with the jumpdrive was a good one. The truck reminds me of an old car of my dad's who actually fixed it up kinda like the 'young jackrabbit'. Great mystery and suspense and you didn't tangle up the action-so Kudos. ^_^
03/14/07
I try to pick out your articles before the hinting starts but am just now beginning (I think)to understand the complexity of at least some of what I've read. Not always a "light" read, but intriguing, informative, nostalgic and sometimes illusionary- lilke a mystery novel.
03/14/07
Kept me on my toes, for sure - you have some zingers of lines in here - I love the one about having to pray because he'd long ago lost the ability to swear. Interesting as always, Dub. :)
03/14/07
Thanks for the brick, I couldn't figure it out from the hint. Well worth the wait. You certainly accomplished a "parody, intentional cliche's"!
03/14/07
Wow, such intrigue! I really enjoyed this and wish it would have been longer. Great story!
03/14/07
I too loved the parts about the hot rodder and the praying because of the loss of ability to swear. This was deep, but a fun ride just the same!
03/15/07
I hope there's going to be a sequel to this. I want to know more! Great writing - I noticed one misplaced word, but love style and your story (or beginning of one?) :)