The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
02/10/07
Wonderful, Jo! I really liked these two stanzas:

I thought that I should change my course
to find a better way,
Or was it wise to jump my boat
and let it go astray?

ďOh, yes itís wise,Ē He did reply
ďJust swim across to me,
Youíll find the One to help you float -
Iíll guard youíre destiny.Ē


...because sometimes what we must do is just NOT the thing that makes sense to us. We want to hang on to the sinking boat...

Well, no sense in me preaching what your poem so wonderfully taught. Great, great job.
02/10/07
Yowsers, Jo! I knew I was missing something the past six months. Excellent job. I've been in that boat before, and where I thought words could not describe, you found them. Superb. Glad to see you back. God bless.
This has a wonderful messsage, and it's SO beautifully written. A modern day psalm, for sure. Excellent!!
02/10/07
Way to go Jo!

Easy flow, a great read and a great message we all can relate to. Welcome back girlfrin! :)
02/10/07
Beautiful truths the whole way through this, and congrats on making this rhyme so well :) I know it's not as easy as it looks.
02/10/07
I loved this. I have experienced being in a boat with waves crashing, wondering if we were going to make it to shore alive. Reading those words in your poem, applying them to life, is so descriptive and real to me. And the thought of staying in a sinking boat ... wow, you really hit it.
02/12/07
I love poems that have such a wonderful, smooth flow that makes it easy to get sucked into the story without getting distracted by the choppiness. Yours did this effortlessly. The rhyme was dead on and the message was too - deep stuff. :-)Excellent job.
Just too many wonders in this poem to list! Beautiful job.
02/13/07
This was one of my favorite stanzas: No longer shall I sail the seas
that man has come to lust,
since now my boat is chartered by
the One Iíve come to trust.

Beautiful job! Blessings, Cheri
I really liked this! Good meter and good pov. I hope you write poetry often.
This is exceptional! Masterfully written poem (that flows beautifully) with heartfelt message of what's important in life.
What a beautiful poem. I have added it to my favorites. Who cannot relate to its theme? Or to the blessing of taking God's hand to guide? When the storms threaten, and only God remains, it's good to know you're known by Him.

Your poetry flows perfectly -- no stumbling to get the meter to fit the thought. Thank you for sharing it.
04/21/08
This is absolutely beautiful, every thought. There is such beauty in truth !