The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
01/25/07
Oh my. I felt like I needed to take martial arts observation lessons to follow what you were doing - and a translation dictionary ... maybe you could just sit beside me next time and tell me what's up! ;) I liked the paragraph where you turned it into something beautiful yet 'deadly'. Interesting.
A unique take on the topic for sure! I too felt a little lost, since this is an art form (and language) I am not familiar with, but I think that you used the right voice and you definitely kept my interest.
01/28/07
I was also unfamiliar with the language, but, to me anyway, it really didn't matter. I could almost feel each movement, and definitely felt his anxiety and discipline. I don't need to tell you this is a unique take on the topic - I was quite engaged.
01/29/07
You are an artist with your words, too. Nicely done.
01/29/07
A good way to look at this topic and though I was a bit thrown off by the language, I liked the way that your sentence structure was part of the execution of the martial arts moves. Good work; thanks for sharing it
01/31/07
I am laughing in delight as I read this. This has got to be my absolute favorite this week! Very light and easy to read, and just wonderful with grabbing the reader and pulling them straight in until the end. I liked the use of the forms and martial arts. Awesome writing!
01/31/07
As I read, I was wishing I understood the movements, so I could picture them in my mind. I'm sure they were beautiful to watch! I also loved your ending! :)
01/31/07
Very unique, creative and well done. God bless.
Congratulatins, Kaylee .. I loved it!
02/02/07
Sweet! I never thought of martial arts as an art form, but this totally changed my mind. I loved it! See you shoutlife!