The Official Writing Challenge
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Wow! Fantastic! I got a little confused at first: were they in an art gallery or in an empty house? You need to put in some type of a transition so that we know which is a past scene and which is the one they are in, currently. Other than that, I found this a very imaginative, thought provoking, moving story. Great job!
Although I was mixed up in the first couple of paragraphs as to where this was taking place - An Art Museum or a dormitory for kids - it then flowed smoothly along; nice story but I (the Reader) wanted some sort of description of this mesmerizing picture...something to make me want to see it in person. Good take on topic, however, and well written.
I didn't have any trouble following the beginning. I enjoyed this piece and it made me wish I had a picture of my own that I could focus on when I needed to just like this woman did.
This story touched my heart. It is sad, yet it fit the topic so well. The painting was symbolic of so much more than what was painted, and you did a great job of communicating that.
I also would have loved to see the painting itself more clearly - but otherwise this was a wonderfully engaging and moving story. Love the end.
This is poignant. You've done a good of capturing emotions. Nicely done.
Very powerful story. If you edit it one more time, consider eliminating the "had" helping verbs and writing in a simple past tense for a smoother read. Thanks for sharing this.