The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
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Date
01/19/07
Loved your story and God's hand in it too.
01/19/07
Oh my, what richness of emotion is here! I screeched to a halt just as your characters did, with the words "Why did you die..." It turned this story from a minor family squabble into something much deeper. You got the voices of both daughters just right. I loved this.
01/20/07
Neat idea. It took me awhile to figure out they had uncovered a mural. Maybe it would be more realistic for the girl to see a barbie arm or leg than to shout, "My barbies." Then again, maybe it's just me :-o. Your characters are very realistic and I love your God writing on the wall theme. Well done!
01/20/07
Charming story. I also got lost for a bit when they found the mural and mentioned Dave for the first time, but I figured it out. Love the little one blaming God, tee hee! I loved this, well done. I think I might know the author, too.
01/20/07
Wonderful dialogue - and I love how you pieced all the parts of this story together, revealing bit by bit. Love the "God did it " thing, and how you tied it in throughout. Great stuff!
01/22/07
Oh, how I loved this. The story line is so good. The dialogue superb. Helen, you are tops! God bless. Thank God for "page four" of hinting.
01/23/07
This is one of my top favs I've read this week. I'm so glad I saw it in the hinting. I loved every little touch you gave it and all characters were so well developed for such a short piece! I will want to read more of your writing from now on. I don't come to masters often, so haven't had the pleasure of reading your writing!Now I've got a taste for more!
01/23/07
I love a story with a great ending. Yours was tops.
01/23/07
this story was wonderful and filled with such a richness of emotions. I loved the language too and the unexpected twist! Great job!
01/23/07

Great use of dialogue---heartwarming story of a mother & her kids. I really enjoyed this!
01/23/07
This piece has heart! I love the entire concept,the message and the dialogue.
04/17/07
Well concieved, and sincere. I enjoyed it.