The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
01/11/07
This sadly rings true--

Mechanically, you might want to go back through and add commas in much of your dialog, when addressing a specific person. For example...

Spirit of Self Condemnation: You called me master?

...should be

Spirit of Self Condemnation: You called me, master?

Otherwise, it has a different meaning.

Thanks be to God for the ability to overcome!



01/12/07
Great skit. Enjoyed it. Hope there's a part two where the good guys win!
01/12/07
I enjoyed the dialogue and the message is one we all need to be hear frequently. We forget who is behind our temptation in areas of weaknesses.
01/13/07
This could be an up-to-date version of C. S. Lewis's "Screwtape Letters". Get rid of the Internet? Perhaps it would be better to just make use of "parental controls" - they're not only for kids. Those who are tempted or fallen need all the help they can get.
01/14/07
I agree with Dolores. It reminded me of the Screwtape letters. Very well written, with a good ending.