The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
12/14/06
I loved this story! Beautifully vivid descriptions (especially of the little girl spitting out the "glass pebbles") and the dialogue brought the characters to life. I liked the description of the broken glass as "jagged shards."

Wonderful closing message!
This was really good. I especially loved the second to last paragraph, about recognizing her face in the face of others who offer their help to those in need.
12/15/06
Wonderful descriptions! Pillowy embrace--secured with prayer--pebbles of glass--oh my, there were so many. And the second-to-last paragraph was the goosebump paragraph, for sure.

I also loved that you've beautifully described this scene exactly as a young child would remember it--looking for mother, the reassuring words of the stranger, the scary sights and sounds. Excellent!
Oh, this is good! The descriptions are vivid, and I really love the last two paragraphs. Well done.
12/15/06
Wow ... this is awesome. What an entry - such good work and I'm so glad I found I found it.

A priceless gem.
12/16/06
Great story. Wish I would've thought of it! God bless.
12/19/06
This happened to me as a child. But I was thrown on the floor. I was with you every step of the way, reliving it all again. What a blessing that you or your character, had the comfort of ordinary hero's. Well done!
12/20/06
This is beautiful. Having been through a car accident myself when I was in fourth grade I know how terrifying the crash and the wondering about the safety of the rest of your family is.

One of the most precious lines I read: "At times, though, I think I have recognized her in the faces of those I have seen reach out to help others in need— those who open their homes to the homeless, feed the hungry, and embrace the hurting. Sometimes I see her in the faces of these regular people."

A very nicely-worded remembrance of a could-have-been tragedy and a special unsung hero.
12/20/06
I read this entry earlier. When I came back to it now and recognized it, the first thing that came to my mind was the glass pebbles in the mouth. What a powerful word picture. Great story.
12/20/06
This is really wonderful. Very well written and I could see the scene clearly. Thanks so much for sharing this
12/20/06
I was right there with you... you conveyed the feelings and impressions very well. I felt the comfort you felt from the woman. Well done...
I knew this would place! Congrats! Great job and well written story.
What a cool, cool story. You are so right that the human spirit of reaching out and helping others in their time of need, is the Unsung Hero.
I loved the way you wrote of seeing the woman's face in those that are the hands and feet of Jesus.
This was very well written and has certainly reminded me of the lasting impact obedience and small gestures of compassion can make.
Blessings on your pen as you continue to write of the Father's heart.