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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Garden (09/07/06)

TITLE: In Defense of Weeds
By Rebecca Livermore


Hi, Iím Willy Weedpatch. Most people donít consider me to be a garden, but surely they donít know what theyíre talking about. After all, I am a plot of land, filled with growing things. They just happen to be growing things most people try to kill.

Iíve never understood that. Why spend time and money desperately trying to kill such amazing works of Godís creation?

Take, for example, dandelions. What isnít there to love about dandelions? They bear cheerful yellow flowers, their leaves are edible and nutritious, and children and adults alike love blowing their nice big seedy balls of fluff. They are one of my favorites! Every time I see someone blow the seeds, I rejoice, knowing that as the seeds scatter, the dandelion population in my garden will increase. How wonderful!

Burdock is wonderfully useful. Besides its medicinal properties, it also helps to fertilize the soil, thus encouraging the development of all the other weeds.

And have you ever considered the virtues of milkweed? It is useful in absolutely every stage of growth! Regardless of its level of maturity, it can be used medicinally, and in some stages it is useful for food also. Next time you develop athleteís foot, or have a wart to remove, you might want to thank God for His thoughtfulness in creating milkweed.

The best thing about weeds is that they are low maintenance. Weeds donít demand pampering, and they donít threaten to wilt if you donít pay enough attention to them. If you go on vacation, when you return home, you will find that not only did the weeds survive, they flourished! Can you say the same of your carefully chosen, high-priced flowers? Of course not! Weeds are obviously superior; they have a strength that more ďnobleĒ plants can only envy. Iíd rather cultivate nice hearty weeds than, say, pansies, any day.

Of course, I donít want to run the risk of having a lawsuit filed against me, so I do feel compelled to provide one word of warning. There are some dangerous weeds, with documented criminal records. Such weeds should be considered armed and dangerous. For instance, weíve all heard of hemlock, a notoriously shady character. He has a rap sheet thatís longer than a sunflower is tall. No one should allow such a killer to grow rampant in their weed patch. Being the responsible plot of land that I am, I kill hemlock before it has a chance to kill anyone else. I would advise you to do the same.

All in all, in spite of the few dangerous weeds, I encourage you to embrace diversity. Dare to be different! Donít be afraid to speak out on behalf of weeds! After all, can you imagine the transformation that will take place in gardens around the world if we allow weeds and flowers to bud together in harmony?

Dreaming about combining weeds and flowers is one thing; having the courage to do it is an entirely different matter. I know that transformation isnít easy, but Iím here to help. Feel free to take some of my weeds to use as starter weeds in your garden. Take as many as youíd like, without worry; theyíll soon reproduce, and no one will ever know that my garden had been ravaged.

In exchange for the weeds Iím willing to freely offer, could you do me one small favor? Before you leave, would you mind blowing that nice, full, ball of dandelion seeds? I canít wait to see how many cheerful yellow flowers and nutritious leaves will result from that one humble plant!

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This article has been read 921 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Chrissi Dunn09/14/06
I love your humorous style. It's true that weeds have many useful attributes too!
Donna Haug09/14/06
Who woulda thunk! Weeds are good. I definately agree that they are hardy. In an open field I love the "wild flowers", but I can't say I'd want them in my garden - even as sad looking as my garden is since returning from my holiday!!
Marilyn Schnepp 09/14/06
Loved the creativity of this author - and also the wit. Very fine writing. An enjoyable read.
Dolores Stohler09/15/06
You and my neighbor ought to get together, lol. Seriously though, we allergy sufferers have a bone to pick with you. Dandelions I don't mind, but there are several that make me ill, such as pigweed. That said, this is very funny. Kudos to you!
Joanne Sher 09/15/06
Very clever and fun! Nice job! I really enjoyed this.
Jan Ross09/15/06
I'm sitting here with the biggest smile! This is truly delightful and creative! "For instance, weíve all heard of hemlock, a notoriously shady character. He has a rap sheet thatís longer than a sunflower is tall." I love it! The wit, the creative "take" on the topic ... it all adds up to an excellent piece! Awesome! :)
david grant09/18/06
I always wondered why weeds grow so easy and fancy plants take such work. Now I know a little more. Here's a glass of COLD milkweed to you for such a fun story!

Phyllis Inniss09/19/06
This is simply brilliant. Who would have thought of someone writing in praise of weeds and with such humour. I thought the description of hemlock truly classic.
Jen Davis09/19/06
A very entertaining and well-written piece. I liked the last line. It made me think about the seeds we scatter when we share our faith. Nicely done!
Jan Ackerson 09/19/06
This is awesome, and thank you for not turning it into a sermon. This "weed" understood perfectly, as will everyone who reads this delightful piece of whimsy.
Val Clark09/19/06
Entertaining, well written, story that can be read on more than one level.
Cheryl Harrison09/20/06
What a fun weed! :o)