Home Read What's New Join
My Account Login

Read Our Devotional             2016 Opportunities to be Published             Detailed Navigation

The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge



how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level


submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners

Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.



how it works   Submit

Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: River (08/31/06)

TITLE: The Secret World Beyond the River
By Debbie Sickler


The sun glints off the glassy surface here, while just upstream, jagged rocks whip and tear at the water, churning it a frothy white. As I stare into the calmness, I wonder what creatures swim, just out of sight. A fish or two perhaps. Maybe a frog or even a freshwater snake. But what if there were some fantastic creature, yet undiscovered by man?

Fully clothed, I jump in.

My body sinks down below any depth Iíd ever imagined a river to hold. I press on, despite the pressure to my lungs and discover a cavern. I swim on. The breath Iíve been holding finally escapes me. To my amazement, I find I no longer need it. Iíve entered into a world nearly indescribable. My eyes take in new plant life and fish of colors a rainbow or sunset would envy.

Suddenly, I hear a voice, a manís voice, calling out to me. Swishing my arms about my sides, I turn and see him. He is far more brilliant than any other thing discovered in this place. Light seems to be emitted from this glorious being; Iím drawn to him inexplicably.

He continues speaking to my heart with a mere look; actual words are not needed here. Itís as though he knows my very soul. I feel unworthy to even be in his presence.

The other creations seem almost reverent of this man as well. Itís as though we all know there is nowhere we would rather be than here, with him.

He gently places his hands on my own and I look upon his face fully for the first time. Pure love shines on his face. He lifts his hands upwards and I begin to rise. He releases me and I float out of his world, back into mine. His image fades from my view, yet the tenderness and love I felt in his presence lingers.

I step back onto the sandy bank in awe of what has just happened. The strange world and all that it held, remain secret. I tell no one of the magnificent being, for fear they will scoff at me, unable to see what I have seen, beyond the river.

The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
Accept Jesus as Your Lord and Savior Right Now - CLICK HERE
JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.

This article has been read 1019 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Marilyn Schnepp 09/09/06
Ah...such a beautiful scene. I wouldn't scoff - I'd want to go there too. This is very creative and well written; I enjoyed the short trip 'beyond the river'. Enchanting - Great job!
Jan Ackerson 09/10/06
Okay, this freaks me out a little--makes me feel like I need to hold my breath--but that's good, you've done a great job of describing this "secret world", and it seems very real.
Donna Haug09/10/06
I wondered what would make "you" jump in fully clothed? And then keep on going inspite of the air running out ... then I clued in ... duh ...
Joanne Sher 09/10/06
Definitely loved the images here - would have LOVED for you to expand a bit more - add some more detail of the whole experience, but perhaps that's just me! I SO wanted to hear more about your "journey." Very nice!
Donna Powers 09/11/06
Very well done. It definitely makes me want to go there, too! Excellent description!
Valora Otis09/13/06
I felt the reverence of the moment. Loved it!
Joanne Malley09/13/06
Love the imagery and the mysticism of this piece. Good job taking us to a place of peace and love. :) Jo
Suzanne R09/14/06
I'm with others saying, "Tell me more!" I wondered too about why you jumped in - it sounds like suicide and concludes with 'Hey, be loved, and have another go at life'. Yet when I went back to the top, I realized that there wasn't that sort of build up ... it was more curiosity????

Anyhow, I love the other-worldly-nature of the piece. Well done.