The Official Writing Challenge
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A great sermon, sermonette or devotional; however, for a Challenge Contest, I'd add an anecdote or two, or begin with something that reaches out and grabs the reader's interest, pulls him/her in, then when you get their full attention, hit them with the facts about Soiled Humans. (Just a suggestion) But nicely written.
I agree that an attention grabber would help. Also watch out for switching from "we" to "you". I do that too.