The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
08/25/06
"Soul hewer"--great phrase!

I'd rework a few stanzas for more cinsistent meter and rhyme scheme, and especially to undo the "have came" construction.

Lots of good stuff here, and a good use of the topic.
This is a good reminder that although we are sometimes faithless, our God remains faithful. i connected with experience of making promises and then, for some reason, not following through. You have some good material here. Another idea, (besides tightening the meter and rhyme as was suggested above) might be to consider reworking this piece as free verse.