The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
08/10/06
It was a wonderful vision (and I really liked the three fish jumping in unison--nice touch), but I can't help but being sorry that Bill was unable to communicate Jesus better to his wife. Nice job with the descriptive elements here.
08/12/06
I like this story. The title...YIKES! Then the grudge against her husband. Then the vision. Good stuff. You brought it to life. However, it was hindered a bit by some bad sentence structure that distracted me. Needs some editing and I think it would be something special.
08/15/06
I was minding my own business, looking at the Advanced title list, when your title grabbed me and pulled me in! A very good piece - I think you've done a good job of showing up superficial loveless faith which doesn;t really touch the individuals it's trying to reach. I'm glad it came good for her in the end!
03/02/07
What an excellent story...and I'm NOT saying it because the main character has a LOVELY name! The title was nothing short of genius, and I loved being in the boat with Jesus! This reminded me of the film, "The Perfect Stranger." If you haven't seen it, check it out! I love to imagine what it would be like to be in His presence. Thanks for a really great story!