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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Work (07/27/06)

TITLE: Inventors From Hell
By April Bailey


Worlim entered the laboratory. “What is that you’re making?”

“It’s my man,” Septus answered.

“Eww. Why is it so ugly?”

“Well, I tried to make it in my own image, but something must have gone wrong.”

Worlim studied the mass. “So, this man of yours … why isn’t it moving?”

“Oh, I can’t seem to get it to work.”

“What have you tried?"


Verx materialized from the wall. “No, you haven’t tried His way.”

Worlim glared at Septus. “You haven’t tried His way? What’s the matter with you?”

“All right. I’ll give it a shot. What is His way again?”

Verx stepped closer. “He breathed the breath of life into his nostrils. Give it a try.”

With one mighty breath, the essence of Septus went into the man, which burst into flames amidst wailing and curses from the trio. “Put it out! Put it out!” They stomped out the fire and wiped off the singed mass.

“Well, the good news is,” Worlim began, “your man doesn’t really look that much worse.”

“Shut up!”

“I have an idea.” Verx licked at the settling soot like falling snowflakes. “You could try giving your life for it.”

Septus bristled. “Give my life for my own creation? Are you stupid?!! There must be some other way to get my man to work.”

“That’s how He did it.”

“Verx, you just said He breathed into the man. But, for me, that failed.”

“Miserably,” Worlim snickered.

“Shut up!”

Verx stared at Septus’ mass. “Once you get your man up and running, you want it to work forever, right?”

“Of course, what’s the point otherwise?”

“So,” Verx continued, “sacrifice yourself as He did, and provide a doorway to eternal life for your man.”

Septus glared at Verx. “You’re suggesting I die willingly so this thing can live?!! Not happening. I don’t even like it, I just want to control it.”

“But that’s what He did, a perfect plan with a perfect execution.”

“Enough about Him! I am not Him and I'm definitely not willing to do that.”

Verx turned away. “Then you’ll never get your man to work.”

“Perhaps there is another way.” Worlim brought forth a simmering platter. “I’ve been working on a new batch of temptations.”

“Hmm,” Septus brightened, “maybe this way I can just take a man from Him, maybe many men. Some will listen, fall into sin and turn away from their Creator. Then I can make His men work for me.”

Even Verx nodded. “Now that’s a plan.”

* * * * *
Genesis 2:7 NKJV “And the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and the man became a living being.”

Genesis 4:7 NKJV "... if you do not do well, sin lies at the door. And its desire is for you, but you should rule over it."

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This article has been read 619 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Deborah Bauers08/03/06
This is a clever piece of work! There's alot to think about...Good work!
william price08/04/06
Very smart! I enjoyed the creativity here. My only thought though was what do these characters look like? I really did enjoy the story and the message ministered. God Bless.
Virginia Gorg08/05/06
Creative and crafty take on evilness. Nicely done.
Marilyn Schnepp 08/05/06
A Very inventive and creative piece of work; however, I have mixed emotions; I don't think man was created for the sole purpose of working for Him - which these Inventors From Hell seem to insinuate...but to be free to think, to love, to enjoy, to laugh, to live - but not just to work. But on the other hand, if it means "work"...as in breathing; then that's a horse of another color. Very, very creative! And...intriguing! Good job!
david grant08/07/06
Great original angle. Liked it very much.

Joanne Sher 08/09/06
Great writing! very clever and thought-provoking. Your characterization is amazing, considering the word count limit. This has given me much to think about. Congrats on your Davey!!