The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
09/13/12
Awww...This was a sweet story, I loved how you shared and described the scene. It was vivid and well written. Nicely done.

God bless~
This is a lovely piece of poetic prose. You paint a vivid description of the world around you. The only thing I might suggest would be to give the reader even more. I'd love to feel the MC's emotions as while looking around at the beauty. Does the heart flutter in sync with the fluttering wings? Or perhaps the nose twitches at the smells wafting from the campfire. You did paint a nice picture--so nice that I want even more. Your MC seems to escape reality for just a bit while exploring this delightful childhood Utopia. Nicely done.
09/18/12
I love birds of all kinds and liked the way you included even the crows which many people think are ugly and a pain, but you said;
"heard sweet melodies from crows,cardinals, bluebirds, juncos,
wrens and many more."

Thanks!
09/18/12
I loved this. It struck me, deeply. I felt it, that place of solitude, as if I was there, but I knew that I wasn't, and that made me a little sad, because I wanted to be in this place you describe.

Simply beautiful.
09/20/12
Congrats on your win!
God Bless~