The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
06/23/11
well done on highly commended i love the title and i love the story....I have told a similar tale but in the form of a poem :-) we all need to slow down at times but it is a challenge... martha and mary , chalk and cheese.:-)
This is a great story. I found myself smiling as she started to slow down. I could easily picture the whole supermarket scene.

I don't think you needed the last paragraph. . It can become a writer's cliche to have the mysterious person be an angel_ Your story was strong and stood on its own merit, Let the reader wonder if the man was an angel unaware.

Just my opinion about the last paragraph. Keep writing I really enjoyed your story. Congratulations on the highly commended.