The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 773 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Good idea, it showed the concept of prioritising our time- Relationship over to do list. One sentence did not appear to be complete though -the one about reading the newest bible verse, time or heritage
03/03/11
Excellent story of how easy it is to devote our time on things that aren't as important as something else. Good for the grandma in the story for choosing to spend time with Michael.
I also caught the sentence error...so easy to do, and we have all done it. Good job writing! God bless!
03/04/11
This hit home to me. Nothing is more impt. than Jesus, and our family. When the two come together as they did in your story, a miracle happens. To have the time to lead a grandchild to the Lord is so marvelous. Thanks for sharing.
03/04/11
this is a lovely story and such a precious portrayal of the relationship between grandma and child.captivating.
being picky i noticed that you use the expression "groaning inwardly" twice and maybe using a slightly different wording for the emotion would flow better than a simple repetition. Having said that you have plenty of lovely dialogue and it otherwise flows beautifully so i am being extra picky here!!
This was one of my favorites.I love how she realized that spending time with her grandson was more important than proof reading her book. Good Job and keep writing.
03/07/11
I love your ending. A child saved, what better gift can we ever receive from our Father God. Keep writing.
03/09/11
I am so glad the grandma realized how much more important spending time with her grandson was--eternal salvation.
03/10/11
well done kaye on the highly commended slot!