The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
07/20/06
Very strong in both rhyme and meter, and I love the whispered "Beware of the dark."
07/20/06
I enjoyed this very much! Yes, "beware of the dark" could very well have been repeated as the theme. I felt it kind of fizzled out in the last stanza, but overall, I loved it!
As Jan already stated, this was structured very well. Nice entry. :)
Good job. Good rhyme and meter, I enjoyed this.
Good job of meter, rhyming & message!
07/24/06
I agree with the above comments about the line "beware of the dark." I also like the line "As you lament, I will as well." Very nice.
07/24/06
My favorite part: "Into the empty space He blew, Igniting the flame of life anew. The fire raged inside His palm, Yet under His gaze it soon did calm." One comment -- I wouldn't have capitalized "hell" but that may be a personal preference. Very nice! :)
07/24/06
I really liked this poem. Flowed well; ryhme and meter were great. Just all around a great poem.
07/24/06
beautiful poem, loved the spark part. Wonderful writing!
07/24/06
Very nice :)
Good poem. Wonderful message and delivery.
07/25/06
Very, very nice. I enjoyed this.
God Bless!
07/25/06
For I shall guide you through the storms
And love you through both praises and scorn.

LOVED that line - I enjoyed this a lot!
A pleasure to read. :)
07/25/06
Very nice job. I've always admired people who can write poetry.
Oh it's so pretty and you are full of talent. I wish I could write poems like this.
Great poem. I just loved it.
I enjoyed this poem, and found the tone fun. I'm am not a poet, so I can't really comment on the technicalities of the poetry, but if I was to suggest ways of improving your poetry I would encourage you to look harder for striking images (and perhaps more "powerful" words). I hope you find these comments helpful. Thanks again for a good read.
Lovely message - and I take my hat off to anyone who can make poetry rhyme like that! Well done!