A box of tissues. What in the world can anyone do with that for a topic? A yellow box with butterflies. Some topic. Writing is therapy? What a joke.
The tears came again. I thought he said time healed wounds. Look at the box of tissues. They set it off again. It's the same color as her room was. She loved butterflies, too. Wonder if there are butterflies where she is now? Maggie’s mind trekked across a familiar terrain.
She stared at the box, reached out and picked it up. She threw across the room. That's what you deserve for treating me and your father that way. How could you be so selfish? It's all about you. Always you. Never a thought of how it affects us. Don't you know how much you hurt us? Don't care either, I suppose.
The anger subsided. She picked up the box and put it in the trash. No more of this. She's decided to make her own way in the world. She grown and can do that. The sobbing started again. Oh, I just wish you would call. No more fights, just to talk. She closed the lid on the trash and walked away. It was over for a while. She wished it was over forever.
Six o'clock already. Have to get dinner started. Where'd the afternoon go? Those pills must be pretty potent. He said they'd make me relax, but this is ridiculous. A whole day gone. And I don't remember it. Gone and don't remember lingered in her thoughts. How nice to be gone and not to remember the pain anymore.
“No! You won't get me that easily.” She grabbed one vial of pills and started for the sink. Gone, no memories, no pain. She poured the contents into the drain and turned on the faucet. Gone, no memories. No pain.
“No. You’re gone and no memories of you will exist.” Gone, no memories, no pain
Maggie continued dinner preparations. A better way. What could that be? Pills don’t get it. That shrink doesn’t have a clue. Living in his little world, with his fancy cars and big house. I probably bought his new boat for him.
Forgive. she thought she heard. Forgive.
“Forgive who? For what? Her? She nearly killed her father with grief. And me, well... Forgive. No way. Not until she comes to her senses. That forgive stuff is garbage. All it does is make it easier for them to do again. Look at my pain. A box of tissues causes pain and I’m tired of it.” she said aloud.
Gone, no memories, no pain. rumbled like thunder through her mind.
Gone, no memories, no pain. pealed again.
No pain.echoed. No pain.
“I am tired of the pain.”
Forgive. whispered through her mind.
“No. She doesn’t deserve to be forgiven.”
Maggie reached into the cabinet for a bottle, twisted the top off and poured some of the clear liquid into a glass. She drank it down, rinsed the glass and set back on the shelf.
No pain. No memories. Gone. lulled her. She finished dinner just as her husband came in the door. One look and he knew she was troubled.
“Maggie, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing, just a hard afternoon.”
“Don’t refer to her like that. She has a name. She’s our daughter.”
“When is this going to end? She’s married with a family of her own. She’s happy. Why do you want to keep on with this? Can’t we have one evening …? You’ve been drinking again, haven’t you?”
She denied it as he left the room.
“He had no right to take her away. She doesn’t see him for what he is.”
Maggie stumbled over a chair on her way to the cupboard. No pain. No memories. Gone. Beside a brown vial sat another box of tissues. She looked at the box---blue with white roses. She had white roses at that wedding and blue for her attendants.
Pain, no pain, forgive.
“Which one do you want?” she heard someone say.
“I won’t forgive and don’t want the pain.” Maggie wept.
No memories, no pain. Gone.
“Gone. I will be gone. That’s what these were for. That’s why he gave them to me. I saved these for this.” She opened the vial and swallowed its contents.
A hideous laughter filled her ears, as a Father wept for His child.
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