The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
07/20/06
Jessica's a brave little girl! This seems more like a high school discussion than a third grade one, though, and as a public school teacher, I have to say that it's very unlikely that a student would be sent to the office for such a thing.

I really like your light touch with dialog, and your open ending.
07/21/06
I agree that this seemed a bit ahead of third graders, but I like the concept. I would have liked to see a bit more of "how can we do that" - good potential! :)
07/22/06
Very good story. I was a little disappointed by the mother's answer at the end, though. She could have mentioned how people can only see the truth if the Holy Spirit shows it to them, or as we Christians present the example in our daily walk. But maybe she wouldn't have time to think of all that, since it was only a few minutes later and she was upset about her daughter being thrown out of class ... That might be something to consider for the sequel! : )
I would have had Mom say, "They are able to see Him through us" or something along those lines. We are His witnesses here, after all. This is how people get to Know Him--they start to wonder what it is about us, and then they start asking questions. Good job, Shannon.