The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 772 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
06/22/06
I really like this story, good job.
06/23/06
Dark, but very well written. Love the ending!
06/25/06
Very poignant descriptions for an intermediate writer. I could feel the cold, the disgust, the fear and uncertainty. Great job!
06/25/06
Well written, held my attention and I was not disappointed, great ending.
06/25/06
A very sad path in this story but you shinned a huge light at the end of the tunnel at the end of your story. Very nice.
Ann, this is a wonderfully crafted description of utter hopelessness. You start out strong with this amazing line: "...sounded like the reverberation of my dreams hitting the brick walls of my life and bouncing back to where they had started." Wonderful stuff! Then you build to the point of nailbiting tension as she relives her experiences with men...I do think your ending is excellent, too. Hope springs eternal, and you gave your readers a shining sliver of it--welcome relief! Excellent read!
This is such a powerful message, and not nearly as uncommon as people would like to believe. Good job.
How is one able to follow comments like the ones above? This was well written & sucked me right in until the end.

Trina<><
06/26/06
Excellent description of her emotions. Just enough to pull the reader in and then keep us there as you worked the story to a good ending. I think you really have talent for making your character real.:)
You need to move up to advance. :)
06/26/06
Oh, this is good. Very well written. Probably the best of this level. Thanks for posting.
06/26/06
You played my heart strings all the way through, ending the song on a good note. This is wonderful. Loved it!
06/26/06
I agree with the concensus that you did an awesome job! Dark and sad, but you must be good because you made us feel it.
06/26/06
Very good descriptions drew me into the scene and her life. Great writing!
06/26/06
Very well written. This should definitely place in this level. Great work! :)
I agree with everyone. Well written. Good job.
Ah, now this has more comments. Somehow I missed the fact that it was this week's challenge article when you sent me the link and I couldn't figure out why there were only two comments because it was a great story! lol
06/28/06
Excellent writing. This would make a really good novel, but it stands on its own as a short story, too. Well done.
06/28/06
Well done - what a shame that this happens to so many children/adults. Nice ending :)