The Official Writing Challenge
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05/19/06
An interesting concept--children as prosperity. The flow of this poem needs a little even-ing out, but it has an abundance of charm.
05/22/06
I liked the line "Stomach looks like bread with too much leaven." My little boy still looks like that at almost 2!
This is a neat concept of a child being the riches.
I agree the flow of the poem needs some work, but very sweet poem otherwise.
This poem has a nice concept. With a little work it could be a real winner.
05/23/06
Great take on the topic! One little thing to polish: you didn't mention month 8 in the first verse (that was jarring, since you mentioned every other month). But overall, this was a delighful read and a very cute concept. Good job.