The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
04/27/06
Very good. I felt the first part was stronger than the second. In the first half, I felt her anxiety, pounded the road with her. But the reunion with her husband, it seemed a bit flat, and from there on it was a bit more 'tell' than 'show', i think. But I still think it was a good piece.
04/29/06
This is very good--it looks like you had some words left; I'd have loved to read more. Be careful of use / used and lose / loose. Good job of capturing the time period without anachronisms. I liked this.
04/30/06
Very well conceived piece, Showing her inner struggle of fear at losing her husband, the ravages of war, and the struggle to keep going in the event of his lost... good job.
This is a good story. I agree with Helen about the reunion between the two. Overall it was nicely written.
05/01/06
I love historical fiction. You did a very good job setting the scene and showing Elizabeth's emotions. I enjoyed this very much!
Very realistic piece. The story and the dialog were well written.