The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
04/13/06

Thank you for sharing this article! It has a very strong, sobering message. You are very clear and precise. Wonderful job!
04/13/06
A lot of great points. I often will experience adversity and troubles when I get closer to God and focus on my writing. Thanks for writing this.
04/13/06
You have dealt with some powerful truths here!

I think it'd be more effective if you stuck to the frist person, until perhaps the last paragraph, when you give your readers an application to their own lives. First person narratives are usually more appealing, less "preachy". And you have a fascinating testimony here.
04/13/06
I liked the testimony part more than the 'preachy' part - a strong testimony, like a good story speaks for itself. And yours is a strong testimony. Thanks for sharing
04/15/06
Called to fulfillment...Yes, we are all given different talents by our Creator. One can paint a picture, one can sing a song, and another can write a poem. All are capable of touching the heart of a lost soul. Well done.
04/18/06
Yes! Great testimony!

I read the advice of someone on the boards at one time, that to use the word 'you' tends to make the reader feel as if the finger is pointed right at them. I think if you rework the last half by adjusting out the 'yous,' you would end up with a super great story instead of just Great! :)