The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
02/21/06
I loved the voice in this story. The ending left me hanging abit, and I wished you had left some spaces between paragraphs for an easier read... but again, the author's voice drew me in.
02/22/06
Unique and readable voice. This might flow better if placed in chronological order, and paragraphed. Excellent effort, thanks so much!
02/24/06
This was very dark and sad and I feel for you if it is a slice of your life, but I thought we were to keep things a little lighter on this site. As for a critique your writing down what happen could serve as healing process for you, I hope so.