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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Escape (01/02/06)

TITLE: A Light in the Darkness
By Jesus Puppy


A Light in the Darkness

The darkness of his confinement was growing more restrictive, and in the past few days the world around him was being shaken more in jolting and convulsive tremors. He would constantly call out to his father, knowing his presence was always near.

"How much longer must I wait, Father?" he called out. "How long before I can escape this present darkness, to be free once more.?"

"Relax, my Son," he could hear the comforting voice reply, "it will not be much longer."

Again his darkened world was jolted, and he could feel his mother's worry over his well being. She needed rest and a place of comfort, but she knew his comfort was more important. He knew her pain for him was great, but he knew also there would be greater joy for her soon.

He could feel his mother’s presence around him and knew that she was trying to relax for his sake. He could hear her from time to time calling out his name or singing a soft lullaby in hopes to calm him, trying so very hard, even in her own time of pain, to comfort him.

He could hear distressing words from those near by and feel even more the pain in his mother, knowing her fear as her pain grew even more. Finally there was a short time of rest, then he heard the words he knew would bring his mother great pain, though it would bring joy as well.

“The time has come, my son,” he heard his Father call to him, and the walls of his confinement began to part, and make way for his escape. “Bring forth Your light into the world.”

He could feel his mother’s pain grow, then lessen, then grow again in convulsive tremors that forced him to the surface. The confining walls fell away slowly, pushing him until he was nearly free. He could feel hands take hold of his head gently, then his shoulders were free as well. He felt the pains of life growing almost too great for him, but knew it would be greater still in time.

Finally he could feel his mother relax, as she laid back spent of what strength she had. He felt her hands take hold of him, as he opened his eye, at first seeing nothing but shadows, and hearing voices as at a great distance.

“Behold the blessing of our God,” he heard a voice say as his mother wrapped clothes around him, laying him in a wooden trough filled with the coarseness of straw.

“His name shall be called Jesus,” Mary said, as she smiled weakly and kissed her new born child.

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Member Comments
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Cassie Memmer01/14/06
What a neat story! Written well, great momentum. Already an established relationship with His Father! Fun perspective!
Debbie Sickler01/14/06
I think this is the first story of Jesus' childhood I've ever read that went back this far! lol What a creative idea and you wrote it very well. The only thing that caught my I to tell you to watch for is capitalization consistency when referring to him. The first time God calls him son, son is capitalized, the next it wasn't for example. Other than that, like I said already, very creative and well written Pup!
Sandra Petersen 01/14/06
Wow! What a great way of portraying our Lord's birth! His Father calling to Him, the convulsive contractions of birth, His purpose for coming hinted at throughout.
I liked your reflection on the words that Simeon would prophesy over Mary and Him: "then he heard the words he knew would bring his mother great pain, though it would bring joy as well." She who rejoiced at His birth would bear the pain of watching Him die. JP, you did a great job with this one!
Linda Watson Owen01/14/06
What a unique perspective! You've done a wonderful job of bringing such a fresh and intriguing approach to this very familiar story. Not an easy thing to do!! I loved it!!!