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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: First (as in original) (01/10/05)

TITLE: First Love
By J. C. Lamont
01/13/05


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The first time I fell in love, the first time it was real, it was as if I was looking into the eyes of my own soul. Deep in those penetrating eyes, I saw myself, starting back at me. It was as though we were entwined; as if our souls were connected in some consequential way. One moment my heart stopped, the next, it raced recklessly, pulsating in my chest.

The beauty of true love, like a rose, caresses the senses, embraces tenderness, and invokes feelings of serenity. His smile, his laugh, the way the hair fell on the back of his neck; it left me breathless.

In the dark recesses of a tortured mind, are the buried memories of love lost. In a dream world, he lives in me and I in him. The gravestone stands silent against the backdrop of death; my heart cries out for the one who made me whole.

My unborn children call out to me. Deep in the night, I hear their cries. But the cruel hands of fate will never let them live. Their names, engraved on my heart, will never come to pass. I stand alone, in the midst of emptiness. Weak. Lost. Alone.

Like the rose that fades and wilts, I slowly fade with the passing of time. The last of my petals remain, threatening to fall. Alas, I will die, and together, in death, we will be united again. My first love. My only love.


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This article has been read 830 times
Member Comments
Member Date
darlene hight01/18/05
You did a brilliant job portraying strong emotion. I tend to agree,however,death is but a temporary situation in which Jesus has broken the cords. First love doesn't dictate only love or last love. In heaven there will be no male or female. We will not be given in marriage it will be a different world than the one that we live in now.Never the less it is a fine piece of writing.
Daniel Tichota01/21/05
Loved the imagery of this line
The beauty of true love, like a rose, caresses the senses, embraces tenderness, and invokes feelings of serenity.
There is no way to escape the feeling of what you expressed in these words.
Deborah Anderson01/22/05
Deep and heavy, but I could relate to what you were saying. God bless you.
L.M. Lee01/23/05
powerful piece