The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
04/12/15
Very nice job of setting the scene, pulling in examples, and closing this in a meaningful, thoughtful, blessed way. Very well written. And, of course, a fabulous message.
04/12/15
Thoughtful piece written from the heart. Thanks for sharing.
04/13/15
Excellent work! Great job with the topic here.

God bless~
I enjoyed this piece. It has a lot of power in it. I could totally relate to your MC. I think many people often wonder those same things. I once told my Bible study that I didn't know if I'd have been able to sacrifice my child like Abraham did. My minister gave me a great answer. I wish I could remember his exact words. Basically, he said that God wouldn't ask me to bear that cross if I wasn't capable. Just like he gave me health problems, not everyone could handle that. He knows what we are capable of and gives us the strength we need to become more capable. Your story reminded me of that powerful message.

As for red ink, I noticed some of your lines could be tightened. For example your opening paragraph could be shortened this way:
As I left the church after the Good Friday service, I zipped up my jacket to brace myself against the cool air. Shivering, I felt that same chill deep in my soul.

Doing little things like that will not only make it easier to read, but will open up the word count for you. You did a great job of writing on topic in a fresh and interesting way. This piece will touch many people in ways you may never anticipate. Great job.
Congratulations on ranking 1st in your level and 17 overall. The highest rankings can be found on the message boards.