The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
02/04/14
Oooohhh... this narrative poem is definitely different!
Just a grammar reminder - When you include a direct address (the person you are speaking to) put commas before and after the name. (...,Lord,... ,my child,...)
I hope I don't have nightmares tonight! *smile*
02/04/14
Excellent job with this very original poem!! I loved it and the message...you did a great job bringing forward a mini Bible lesson while warning us to pay heed!

I loved it. Great job.

God bless~
02/04/14
Wow. It seems like Deb and Bud have quite a story between them. It felt as if there was so much more than could fit in a mere 750 words.

Good job with the rhyming, I was able to follow your narrative all the way down to the last verse and I really liked the flow of it. Thanks for sharing--what an interesting take on the topic!
02/05/14
I didn't know what to think when I started reading, (aliens and all that) but you did a great job bringing a Bible lesson into the story.

Keep writing!
I'm amazed that you had so many engaging verses. I was drawn into the story from the beginning. You are very talented.