The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
01/20/14
Very good writing and good thoughts.

It is always joyful when a person finds Jesus as the Messiah and yields to his Lordship in obedience and is baptized for the forgiveness of their sin and then God gives his Holy Spirit to him as evidence of his heirship of God and joint heir of Jesus.

Keep your heart on heaven and your eyes on his word.
01/21/14
This is an excellent piece. And I love the word pictures! That song has been a favorite of many. You did a good job of tying it all together and good use of scripture at the end.

Write On! Scribe for the Lord.
01/25/14
I enjoyed this piece. I can tell you did a great job of researching and checking your facts. Though I'm not familiar with that song, it is an awesome verse and does speak to my heart.

You may want to consider tightening some of your sentences. For example the first line could be turned to this: Nearly a century ago in 1917, the lyrics and music of the song,"The Love of God" were created by Frederick Lehman.On the message board there is a thread called Jan's Writing Basics. It's an awesome opportunity for writers of all levels. She just did a lesson on tightening. Jan is great about responding to each person who posts on her thread.

I also enjoyed the ending. You painted a beautiful picture and the verses you selected were a perfect fit for your message. Good job and keep writing!