The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 194 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
01/21/14
This is a nice piece. You have a good talent for writing. I hope to see more of your entries in the future. Keep on writing!
01/21/14
This piece has a lovely cadence to it. Beautiful writing, and a tale that warms the heart. Thank you.
You did a delightful job of setting the scene in this story, I could hear the babbling brook and the chirping birds. I could also feel the pain of the MC.

One tiny suggest you might want to consider is putting her thoughts and prayers (unless she's praying aloud) in italics. It will stand out to the reader more.

You did a nice job of weaving the message throughout this piece. The ending brought the story full-circle. Congratulations on ranking tth in level two. The highest rankings can be found on the message boards.