Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Elephant in the Room (12/05/13)
TITLE: Are Elephants invited to the Wedding?
By Amanda Greenwood
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“Elephant in the Room” appeared to be the very subject of my college roommate’s special day. In fact, the pastor himself mentioned that elephants actually appear in sanctuaries on days like today, sanctuaries where man becomes husband and woman becomes his wife. Yes, he believed that such an elephant is divorce. And, as I adjusted my position in the pew, I did agree that I had never attended a wedding ceremony centered on divorce. Although not completely opposed to his mini sermon, I will say that this was not the topic of choice for my own ceremony just over a year later.
I can’t say that he was completely off-base; however, I think the divorce elephant is one to be addressed in marriage counseling before the actual cerermony. As the survivor of a 6 week “boot camp,” as my husband and I fondly refer to now, I will say that talking about the topics surrounding the issue of divorce are valuable conversations to have with your future spouse under the guidance of a trained Christian counselor.
When in love and looking forward to the plans to be made and the dreams to come true, questions such as “Whose family will you visit for Christmas this year?” may seem trivial; however, such questions unveil that elephant named expectations. Unfortunately, expectations addressed in the room after the “I do’s” can be much heavier than those before the altar or, in my roommate’s case, at the altar.
Marriage counseling should be a requirement for engaged couples because even Christian couples are not going to get along 100 percent of the time, maybe not even 90 percent of the time. That is because a husband and a wife are two different humans, each one with a different “expectations elephant,” working toward one happy family.
Marriage counseling sessions bring individuals together beyond just mere compatibility through Biblical principles and commands for husbands and wives. Marriage counseling is not a one-time fix-all until “death do us part.” However, it addresses that elephant in the room we each have before it becomes awkward (at the altar) or too big for the room (at the brink of divorce).
The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
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