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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Elephant in the Room (12/05/13)

TITLE: Are Elephants invited to the Wedding?
By Amanda Greenwood


As I looked toward the altar, bride and groom smiling sheepishly at one another, I wondered if they were too in love to notice the weird ceremony topic or if they, too, were questioning their officiant’s topic of choice.
“Elephant in the Room” appeared to be the very subject of my college roommate’s special day. In fact, the pastor himself mentioned that elephants actually appear in sanctuaries on days like today, sanctuaries where man becomes husband and woman becomes his wife. Yes, he believed that such an elephant is divorce. And, as I adjusted my position in the pew, I did agree that I had never attended a wedding ceremony centered on divorce. Although not completely opposed to his mini sermon, I will say that this was not the topic of choice for my own ceremony just over a year later.
I can’t say that he was completely off-base; however, I think the divorce elephant is one to be addressed in marriage counseling before the actual cerermony. As the survivor of a 6 week “boot camp,” as my husband and I fondly refer to now, I will say that talking about the topics surrounding the issue of divorce are valuable conversations to have with your future spouse under the guidance of a trained Christian counselor.

When in love and looking forward to the plans to be made and the dreams to come true, questions such as “Whose family will you visit for Christmas this year?” may seem trivial; however, such questions unveil that elephant named expectations. Unfortunately, expectations addressed in the room after the “I do’s” can be much heavier than those before the altar or, in my roommate’s case, at the altar.
Marriage counseling should be a requirement for engaged couples because even Christian couples are not going to get along 100 percent of the time, maybe not even 90 percent of the time. That is because a husband and a wife are two different humans, each one with a different “expectations elephant,” working toward one happy family.

Marriage counseling sessions bring individuals together beyond just mere compatibility through Biblical principles and commands for husbands and wives. Marriage counseling is not a one-time fix-all until “death do us part.” However, it addresses that elephant in the room we each have before it becomes awkward (at the altar) or too big for the room (at the brink of divorce).


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This article has been read 299 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Judith Gayle Smith12/15/13
Sigh. My first husband and I were counseled by our pastor, but the areas needed to be stressed and understood, such as God's Ten Commands were not mentioned. If we both had truly possessed God, not just professed Him, we would still be together . . .

Please "throw a brick" for others to enjoy, comment and support your writing:


Hebrews 10:26-31 KJV
Sheldon Bass 12/17/13
A profoundly vital topic. The family is the foundational building block for society. As a minister, I encourage the "boot-camp" you describe. I feel at least some counselling should be required before a marriage licence is issued. Most young couples have no idea what they are signing up for.

Great job. Your elephant trumpets nicely!
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 12/18/13
This is an interesting article. You make some great points. It takes hard work to maintain any relationship, but especially married. I think many Christian couples may not see eye to eye fifty percent of the time. :-)

My only red ink would be to cut down on the word elephant. You nailed the topic, even if you took out every phrase that had the topic words in it. Some of the best on topic articles never mention the topic words.

You make some great points. It's important to have pre-marital counseling and figure out some of the big issues to avoid conflict later. You did a nice job overall on this interesting, informative piece.

Judith Gayle Smith12/19/13
Yay! Congratulations on your well-deserved win!

Love & Hugs in, through and because of Jesus, the Christ,

Judi Hebrews 10:26-31 KJV
Happy Holydays, beware the holly daze . . .