The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 260 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
06/14/13
You did a good job with your MC. I understand how he feels.
I like his solution, too.
06/17/13
My heart ached for them. Your ending gives me hope that they can work through this.
I really enjoyed this. I think a lot of people could identify at some level with your characters. One thing I might suggest would be to give them names to help the reader comment the characters more. Also, together have quite a few lines that start with the word she. Try mixing up the sentence structures a bit. You nailed the topic. I thought it original that, in the beginning, the humming was ominous, but at the end, it was joyful. That is a great allegory for Christians.