Painful Peace | Previous Challenge Entry

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TITLE: Painful Peace | Previous Challenge Entry
By Linda Gage
02/14/13
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‘Ran to the store; see ya later.’ Not a spectacular speech, but the very last words I had from her and I hold onto them dearly.

That morning I needed arrive at school early for a meeting. I didn’t see her but heard her three, four or five times! just I covered my head like every other day because it got on my nerves. But, I couldn’t show up late because, “It wouldn’t look good,” as she always said.

My breakfast was ready and lunch packed. She had left for work, which made me glad. I wouldn’t have to hear the usual montage of ‘be careful’ and ‘watch the other guy’ amongst other motherly instructions that I heard a million times. Running late, despite the wake-up call, I tried not to speed. Her voice in the back of my head, “If you get a ticket you’ll be in trouble!” I just made it on time.

The seniors were rushing in with excitement for our last meeting before graduation. As president, I took charge and called us all to pray. Mom always started prayer with thanks to God, so I did. Prayer kept us calm for just 5 minutes as we thanked God for His blessings and asked for guidance beyond the doors of this school. We were allowed to pray because this was a Christian school. Mom and Dad had sent me to one since I was in kindergarten. I heard God’s Word daily, but wasn’t thinking of that. We had to make big plans for celebrations! The meeting ended and we dispersed to class.

I struggled with academics. Mom always told me Bible class and learning how to live God’s way is the most important but what was I supposed to do with mediocre grades after graduation. My friends had high grade point averages and had already been accepted to great colleges. Mom said it didn’t matter what I did as long as I put Christ first. Those were lost words because even in Christian school everyone asked, “What college are you going?” Not, “Are you going to live a Christ-like life after high school?”

After class I hopped in my car and trying not to speed, sped to the department store. Mom gave me her card so I could get a graduation outfit. Usually, we shopped together, but she had to work; somebody had to pay for my education. At least it would avoid arguments about ‘that’s too short’ or ‘that’s too low.’ I chose a dress that I hoped she would approve.

Then off to hang out with the same friends that I have had since elementary school. We had never gotten in any trouble but it didn’t stop Mom from reminding me to be good, don’t drink, and don’t do drugs. I think she knew me better than this but being a mom it was her duty to constantly remind me.

I got home just before curfew. She was usually sleeping by this time, so it was strange that she was out. I plopped in front of the TV that mom told me I couldn’t spend more time watching than doing homework. Then came the phone call from Dad. He was somber. He was at the hospital. There was a terrible accident. He was okay, but mom wasn’t. She would not be coming home.

The rest of that week seemed unreal. The arrangements, the service, the sobbing are all a blur.

After it all, I sat down at the dining room table and there was the note and her last words to me, ‘see ya later.’ Suddenly a rush of tears came that were painful yet peaceful.
There would be no more wake-up calls, lunches ready, nagging about driving, interrogations about drugs or drinking, no more shaking of her head at my clothes and no more prayers with Mom. This was painful.

Then overwhelming peace with the thought that, "Yes, I would see her later."

We both knew and trusted Jesus Christ as our Savior. She told me her story of when she was 27 and accepted Christ. She was there when I asked her how to pray to God and ask Jesus in my heart so I could go to heaven too.

It’s not just a note from Mom. It’s a reminder of God’s promise to save us when we believe that His Son, Jesus Christ died for our sins.

Mom believed it. I believe it! If you believe it – see you later!

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