The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
I enjoyed this piece. Though the message is similar to other stories this week, your POV was fresh and creative. Usually when I read something that asks questions it can turn me off by feeling too preachy. However you avoided that by making most of the questions part of a test. I thought that was quite clever.

I think if you look at your opening you will be surprised how many times you used APFT or any of the words in it. Just by restructuring some of the sentences you can avoid that repetition and tighten up your writing. Here's an example: The army uses the Army Physical Fitness Test(APFT) as a way to gauge our level of coordination and strength. In order to pass this rigorous exam, we must exercise on our own time because preparation makes it easier.

I did really enjoy this piece and your message made me stop and think which is always a good thing. You did a nice job of coming full-circle in the ending too. Overall, you did a fine job.
REALLY good analogy. I enjoyed this very much.
clever use of the topic and a wonderful job with this. Thank you. God bless~