The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
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Date
11/23/12
I'm glad the brothers were able to reconcile before it was too late.
This is a story that is more common than many people would like to admit. Your siblings are likely the one person who will be there from cradle to grave. Yet for some reason, many get caught up in silly rivalries. Your story really showed what is important. Good job,
11/25/12
I loved the story and the concept of the two brothers wasting so much time and then reconciling at the end (and that happens way too often in life!). Once Cindy shows up at the door, the story picks up the pace. I think perhaps the beginning is a little to "telling" and you could have packed more punch with a little more action and "showing." This is something that is learned with practice, and I look forward to more entries from you. Well done!
11/27/12
This story will touch many, and it held an element of authenticity throughout. Nicely done. Thanks.
God bless~