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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Sweet to the Taste (08/23/12)

TITLE: Ode to the honey bee
By A B
08/29/12


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I lay and I pondered the Faithwriters topic
And sleepily wondered, if simply quixotic
Or sober was better, or maybe sublime,
Fiction, devotional, free verse or rhyme?
Quiescently drifting, in deep contemplation
Amid the ideas, came visualisation,
Of bees in their hundreds, with rivers of honey
Deliciously sticky, bright golden and runny
From subconscious slumber, I knew I must feature
This wonderful, hard working, smart little creature

But now as I sit in the cold light of the day
I'm scratching my head, knowing just what to say
The deadline is looming
The word count consuming ...

Armed but not dangerous,
Clean and industrious
Bees pull together and work as a team,
Their innate immunity,
Is down to their unity
And total submission, within the regime

But just as we learn from our friends, black and yellow
The zebub, or fly, is a horrible fellow ...

Void of authority,
Death, a priority,
Spreading disease and attracted to dung
Homeless and indolent,
Lives this itinerant,
All out for self, with no thought for his young!

Now I fear, that I've strayed from the topic instructed
By talking of flies, I have wandered off track
Some points will undoubtedly, now be deducted
All hope is diminished, alas and alack

I'll close now by sharing some things I am learning,
In Hebrew, our 'Bee' is akin to 'The Word'
And God's Word is sweet to the wise and discerning
Who savour it's goodness, to taste of the Lord


He said to me, "Son of man, feed your stomach and fill your body with this scroll which I am giving you." Then I ate it, and it was sweet as honey in my mouth. Ezekiel 3:3 NASB

O taste and see that the LORD is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in him. Psalm 34:8 KJV


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This article has been read 302 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Janice Wappel08/30/12
I enjoyed this very much.. Yes, you wondered off track for a "little bit", but you brought it all together in the end!
Thanks
CD Swanson 08/31/12
I loved how you brought the essence of your writing into the fold of the topic. I enjoyed it very much. Nicely done. God bless~
Mildred Sheldon08/31/12
I loved your poem. You may have strayed a tad, but in the end you pulled it all together. Keep writing and God bless.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 09/04/12
I really enjoyed this. You had me giggling and empathizing as well. Many of my stories seem so much more profound while I'm half asleep than they do in the light of day. However, you do need to be careful about mentioning FW and the contest because the top ten have the chance to be published in an anthology where the reader may not know anything about the site, the contest, topics or rules. However, I think all of the FW readers will absolutely adore this and find it a delight to read. Personally I think writing about flies on dung is fresher than bees. Hmm maybe fresher is the wrong word but more out of the box! I've read quite a few honey and bee stories this week but I do believe this is the first fly story and any country girl can tell you that cow dung has a sweet smell. I've never tasted it but I'm sure the flies find it delightfully sweet. I really enjoyed this and find it one of my favorites.