The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
11/02/05
Good job; I think present tense works well for this word picture. Just a few past tense verbs to edit, then. While you're editing, take out the references to "you" in the 4th paragraph. I loved the ending; it wasn't what I'd expected at all. Thanks for writing this!
11/02/05
Wow! Godly warriors fighting for the souls of mere humans while they sleep unawares! Great story:)
11/03/05
Good story telling, some issues where with basic grammar, you might have someone proof your work to avoid run-ons and comma issues. Thanks for posting.
11/03/05
Good work on the story telling. Creative. God bless ya, littlelight