The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
05/12/12
WOW! This story had my heart in a sling. I was moved and touched. The mother going through the torment of losing a child is bad enough, but to realize she was the caused it! Unbearable.

But with Jesus and prayer, all things are possible to walk through, and get through. This was well written-and contemporary. It is a hot topic today with all of the unnecessary deaths due to texting. So this hit home with a wallop due to the reality impact.

I pray this isn't a "true entry."

Thank you for sharing.

God Bless,

Camille~
05/12/12
WOW! This story had my heart in a sling. I was moved and touched. The mother going through the torment of losing a child is bad enough, but to realize she was the person that caused it! Unbearable.

But with Jesus and prayer, all things are possible to walk through, and get through.

This was well written-and contemporary. It is a hot topic today with all of the unnecessary deaths due to texting. So this hit home with a wallop due to the reality impact.

I pray this isn't a "true entry."

Thank you for sharing.

God Bless,

Camille~





05/12/12
Such a sad entry. I hope it's not true too but I can see how it could happen. So awful. You did a good job writing it and I'm so glad you didn't tell us the outcome. I know you were probably tempted:) I was hoping you didn't because the outcome wasn't the point. The weariness and keeping on was the point. Good job!
This is a great story. You did an outstanding job of building the conflict with suspense.

I think the beginning may have been stronger if you had started with the I killed my daughter paragraph. Those are words that will grab a reader, make her gasp and want to read more.

The prayer was beautiful. I love it when authors show the reader how to pray. After I read it, I went back and prayed it. It helped ease the burdens I've been carrying today.
05/17/12
Congratulations. God bless~
05/18/12
Congratulations on your 3rd place. A very moving piece of writing.