Home Read What's New Join
My Account Login

Read Our Devotional             2016 Opportunities to be Published             Detailed Navigation

The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge



how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level


submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners

Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.



how it works   Submit

Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Rich (04/26/12)

TITLE: A Change In Perspective
By Michelle Boyd Waters


Joseph slouched down in his desk at school and scowled at anyone who dared make eye contact with him. Not that anyone could, with his unkempt hair flopping in his face. Not that anyone wanted to.

His English teacher began reviewing the book they'd been reading, but Joseph didn't listen. He'd read the entire book in one evening. It wasn't like he had anything else to do. They didn't have a television since he'd knocked it off its stand one day playing football in the house. And he wasn't old enough to drive yet. Not that having a license would help him, since the family only had one car and his dad used it to drive to his burger flipping job.

His father had lost his good-paying union job when the local factory closed. Most of his friends moved away. But his parents decided to stay. He couldn't understand it.

The only friend he had left was Matt. They'd been neighbors since kindergarten. Then Matt's father had gotten a better job in the city and commuted two hours a day. He earned loads of money managing a bigger and better factory. So Matt had moved to bigger and better neighborhood. But they'd been friends since kindergarten, and they weren't going to let little things like ratty jeans and B.O. get in the way.

A few weeks before the factory closed, when his friends were talking about the new cities they were moving to, Joseph had tried to convince his parents to move, too.

"Don't you realize this is going to ruin my life?!" he'd yelled at them.

But his parents didn't seem to care.

"Son, we've got God and we've got each other. We'll be fine," Joseph's dad said.

Joseph couldn't believe his ears.
So now, Joseph sat in his classroom, ostracized because of his ratty shoes with the flippity-floppity soles that made kids snicker in the hallways. His hair hung over his eyes in greasy strands because the water had been turned off for the third time and he couldn’t shower with bottles of water. He tried keeping his stench down with cologne during those dry times, but Axe would only go so far.

Just thinking about his poverty was depressing, so he closed his eyes behind his curtain of hair and snoozed until the bell rang.

He hadn't made it ten feet down the hall after class when Matt fell into step with him.

"Hey, you want to come over after school?" Matt asked.

Joseph figured it would be nice to play rich for an evening, so he agreed.

After school, Matt drove them out to his gated community in a new candy apple red Corvette. He tried not to grimace too much as Matt described its horsepower and handling.

Matt parked on the brick driveway and led Joseph up the steps to the stately double door and let them in. They walked back to the kitchen, where Matt's mother stood cutting up onions.

At first, Joseph thought her eyes were wet because of the onion fumes. But then he saw the purple and black discoloration around her eyes, and noticed that she never quiet looked up at him or at Matt.

He looked at his friend, and saw that Matt wasn't quite as happy any more. They exchanged awkward pleasantries and headed up to Matt's room.

"What happened to your mom?" Joseph asked.

Matt busied himself setting up a video game on his flat screen TV.

"Did she fall down or something?" Joseph pressed.

"I don't think so," Matt paused. "I heard her and Dad yelling last night."
He stopped and stared off into the distance. Then he took his shirt off and Joseph gasped. Matt had the same purple and black discolorations on his ribs.
"Dad just gets stressed lately," he shrugged. "I forgot to take out the trash and I thought he was going to break my ribs."

Joseph thought he could see tears in Matt's eyes, but he didn't know what to say.

That night, Matt stopped in to say hello at the little cracker box on the old street, the one they'd shared PB&J sandwiches in and his mom and doctored their knees in. The boys walked inside and saw Joseph's parents sitting together on the couch, holding hands and reading a Bible. They looked up and smiled at Matt and Joseph.

Matt smiled back and then whispered, "Wow. I wish I could have your parents."
Joseph wept.

The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be right now. CLICK HERE

JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.

This article has been read 319 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Ada Nett05/03/12
This story left me with a deep sense of what treasures really are. You covered the topic and left a poignant message that's not going to be forgotten by your readers.
C D Swanson 05/04/12
This was so powerfully executed, and brought forth a myriad of emotions. This is so true of many people's personal lives...money doesn't mean anything.

God and love are what it is all about. This brilliant entry will resonate in the readers minds long after its read.

Thank you. God Bless~
C D Swanson 05/04/12
This was so powerfully executed, and brought forth a myriad of emotions. This is so true of many people's personal lives...money doesn't mean anything.

God and love are what it is all about. This brilliant entry will resonate in the readers minds long after it's read.

Thank you. God Bless~
Donna Wilcher05/05/12
Great work!
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 05/06/12
This is a great story. I loved the characters and the descriptions. I was pulled in by the first sentence.

In my opinion the ending seemed kind of abrupt. I know part of it was the word count but it may have been stronger if you had ended it with Matt's comments. You did such an excellent job of putting the problem in the forefront that the reader didn't need to know Joseph wept to realize he had learned a lesson. I wondered if it was a play on the Bible verse Jesus Wept because the names were so close.

Other than that one bit every other part was fabulous. You nailed the topic in a great way. The title may have given the ending away a bit but I still think the message is one we all could remember. It's like the old saying walk a mile in someone else's shoes. Great job on this piece.

Graham Insley05/07/12
An excellent picture of dejection and rejection that comes into correction.

There was one 'quiet' which should have been a 'quite', but I feel a nit-picker for pointing it out when you did such a good job.

Laury Hubrich 05/07/12
You did a good job comparing and contrasting the two loves in the homes. Good job.
Colin Swann05/07/12
Good job at showing what true riches are! Thanks!
Mildred Sheldon05/09/12
This is a very powerful story and the title said it all. A very well written piece. Thank you for sharing and God bless.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 05/14/12
Congratulations for ranking 8th in level two!