The Official Writing Challenge
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This is a great sermon about a subject that many of us like to push aside I liked how you shared a part of your own story.

I would have liked to hear more from your POV with it being backed up by the scriptures. This would also help you avoid the awkward her/him. I think you could have used her one time and him the next without offending anyone or tell it in the third person.

That might help it become less dry and attract more readers. With a message this important you need to tell it to as many people that your can.

Congratulations for placing 6th in level 2!