The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
06/09/11
I was sitting in that tree with you, hanging on every word. What a beautiful story told from a young child's eyes and heart! Thanks for sharing your testimony.
Thank you for a simple story told through the eyes of a child.
Both tender and hopeful in the midst of sorrow. The young girl's perspective was a good option to capture the scene. I did wonder, however, if she would have known terms like worship leader and recognize the workings of the Spirit. Encouraging story.
Being an observer and often a tree dweller myself, growing up, I could relate to this piece. This is nicely written and so heartfelt that I was right up there with the girl, feeling her pain, curiosity and wonder, and finally the desire to reach out to an unseen hand, that waited for me. I know my mom told me of tent revivals in her day and they often fascinated me. I'm not sure if you intended to show comparisons but the preparation of the tent for the upcoming event and the girl preparing to attend the revival and the minister preparing the invitation were right on.
Oh I like this one! Your ending, as the Lord has prepared a way for all of us to come to Him, was so fitting, as a young girl simply comes with child like faith, to a God who is waiting to heal her and her mama. BEAUTIFUL!Love this!
06/15/11
great story... I had my favorite tree as well as a child of the same age as your MC but mine did not have a revival tent at the base :-) I met with God there though and so this story had a lovely resonance.
the only change I would make is give it a more interesting title
and the story as it stands is not really about Mama in any detail.