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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Fruit (10/10/05)

TITLE: One Bad Apple
By Larry Elliott
10/14/05


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She awoke and yawned. A breeze animated the trees above causing sluggish strobes of morning sun on her face. She savored the waking sounds and smells of nature as much as falling asleep to gentle symphonies of gurgling river, operatic birdsongs, the bass line of bullfrogs and rhythmic crickets. As she sat up and stretched her husband awoke.

“Where are you going?” he asked as she stood.

“To the river. I’ll be right back.”

“Trout and biscuits for breakfast again?” He sighed and closed his eyes.

“No silly man. I want to wash the sleep from my face do something with my hair.”

“Why? Your hair looks fine to me.” He grinned.

“You are such a male.” She smiled back.

He leaned up on his elbow, watching as she walked away. He had never seen such a beautiful creature. He was so blessed to have her in his life. If it meant sleeping out here close to the river once in a while to make her happy it was well worth it.

“Hurry back.” He yelled after her. She stopped, stooped to pick up a small stick and hurled it in his direction, missing by a mile but surprising a small brown rabbit. She laughed and trotted on.

When she was out of sight he tried to doze but kept thinking about tomorrow’s inventory.

A short time later his wife returned excited and wet. Water dripped from her hair onto his face jolting him to reality. He could sense her exhilaration.

“What’s going on?” he asked sleepily.

“Look.” She said and extended her hands. Cupped there she held a bright red orb the skin dabbed with bits of green and yellow.

“What is this?” he inquired.

“It’s breakfast. It’s fruit.” She replied.

“I can see that, but where did you get it?”

“Some guy down by the river just gave it to me.”

“What guy? Have you ever seen him before? Do you know him?”

“Just some guy. He was real nice. He looked kind of familiar, though.”

“You mean familiar as in some Joe on the street or wanted poster familiar?

“There you go being silly again. Here try it. He promised it would be sweeter than anything I have ever tasted.”

“I’m not going to eat that.”

“Aren’t you hungry?”

“Well, sure. But what if it’s poison?”

“It’s not poison. It’s beautiful.” She cooed.

“Good, then go display it next to all those other knick knacks you collect while I whip up a real breakfast.”

“Stop making fun of me.” She pouted. Her eyes began to glisten with moisture.

“Hey, I’m sorry.” He wrapped his arm around her. She stared at the fruit. Then bit a big chunk from it. She closed her eyes and chewed. “Mmm, this is wonderful” she said and held it out to her husband.

He hesitated, then took it from her and bit. “Wow, this is good. Where did you say he got this from?”

“Well, um, it came from a tree on the other side of the river- I think.”

“What? Not the one at the bottom of the valley. Please say it isn’t so.” He stood.

“Hey!” his wife exclaimed. “You’re naked!”

“What?” he asked with a puzzled look on his face.

“Put some clothes on, for Pete’s sake.”

“Who is Pete? And what are clothes?”

“I don’t know, but someone might see you.” She pleaded.

“By the way I just noticed you’re not wearing anything, either. Besides there is no on else around but me and you and…” He stopped suddenly and turned an ear toward a large path leading out of the woods. “Do you hear that? He’s coming. He is whistling a different tune this morning. I have not heard this one before. Quick, grab a trash bag or something to cover up with.”

“What is a trash bag?” she asked.

“I don’t know, it just sounded good. Over there.” He pointed to a tree bearing large green leaves. “Get some of those and hurry. Let’s hide in that thicket and get dressed.”

“Get what?”

“Oh just come on.”

Later they heard a familiar voice. “Adam? Eve? Where’d you go?”

“Uhm…, we’re over here, hiding.” Adam answered.

“Why art thou…, I mean, how come?”

“Well, uh, we don’t have a decent thing to wear.”

“I see. You both will leave here forever. As of now this park is officially closed. By the way…, those vines holding up your skirts are poison ivy.”


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This article has been read 489 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Julianne Jones10/17/05
A humourous take on a well-known story - but the barb is still there: they have to leave the 'Park'. An enjoyable read. Well done.
Donnah Cole10/17/05
What neat storytelling abilities you have -- such a great take on a modern version of Adam & Eve! Good dialogue and flow...
Kathryn Wickward10/18/05
Very smooth transition to the heart of the story, which of course helped the humor along! Nice work!
Alexandra Wilkin10/20/05
I like this take on the Adam and Eve story very much! It flowed very well, and held me from start to finish. Like the ending, left me smiling! God bless.
Anita Neuman10/20/05
This is a very cute and humourous story, but I got stuck on a few details - like what other "males" is Eve comparing Adam to? And why is there poison ivy in the perfect Garden of Eden? Regardless, this is a great story!