The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
06/03/11
I really liked this. It certainly fit the week's theme of 'sellout', but a much stronger feeling hit me from the moment Matthew and his mates came back for him - vulnerability. This was a great perspective on this often-told scripture, and I'll be back to read it again. Thanks and well done.
06/03/11
I enjoyed your persceptive on a familiar story. Good message and it has a nice flow. Good job.
06/06/11
Great job re-telling an old familiar story. Good writing skills. Keep it up! God bless!
06/08/11
Yeah liked it a lot, great take on the story, well worth reading and nicely written.

You asked for criticism the only thing I can really say is that I did not need the last paragraph.

The whole story is very well written and even though I know the story so well, I was gripped until the end. That is quite a gift you have there.

Cheers
06/08/11
Wonderful voice and great descriptions. The only jarring things was how he went from the roof to the floor at Jesus' feet. Suddenly he was just there. But what I loved most was that he was crippled when he fell off a roof. How appropriate.

Oh yeah. I love the title too.
06/08/11
You did a great job with the retelling of this story. I didn't realize what it was until they climbed the roof. You did a great job in retelling it in clear words and with an element of suspense.

You've probably seen this but you used covert (which means secretive) instead of covet.

You did a nice job of pulling the topic into this story too. Your MC was believable and the dialog realistic. It took me back to Bible times. Nice job!
06/09/11
I enjoyed the read and the fictionalized account of the event. Great job!
06/09/11
This is unique; I love the point of view. The narrative held my interest throughout. This was very well written. I especially enjoyed hearing how the MC felt about everything. Excellent story!
06/09/11
Second Place!!! Woo hoo!! Congrats!!