The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
05/12/11
Beautiful! Love the imagery.
05/14/11
I just love this! Each 'journey' is described beautifully, and the way you weave Jesus into the end is so powerful. A fantastic piece of writing, well done!
well done! good word choice and imagery,, I like the rhythm of it, and it moves through life's journey in a very compelling way
05/15/11
I really like the subtle rhythm and the occasional rhyme. This poem flows very nicely, and it was a joy to read of the journey through life--from one outgoing to the next--until our final outgoing!! Great job!
FANTASTIC! Truly an enjoyable read. Your poetry flowed like a river meandering where life leads from beginning to end. The imagery was perfect. This in my opinion truly is a winner. Great job and keep writing.
05/18/11
The occasional rhyme, the sequential flow from one journey to the next, and the myriad of word pictures creates an eloquent piece. I so enjoyed walking that journey with you, and you couldn't have had a better ending...!

A more "telling" transition for the second and third journey is my only suggestion. "The second journey..."The third journey..." stops the flow, in my opinion.

Still, a real winner!
05/18/11
Sorry, meant "Showing" transition rather than "telling," My bad.:-)
I loved this poem...congratulations on your well deserved win