The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Sounds divine! You had a run-on sentence in the 1st paragraph that could easily be fixed...and perhaps it's just me, but "...She slid into the marbled floor bathroom..." reminds me of a person sliding into 2nd base. But you did a marverlous job at depicting the beauty of a honeymoon, and implying the passion there.
You started well, but I felt the ending could have been expanded. Perhaps rather than "They talked about their dreams for their future" you could have used dialogue to allow the reader to listen in on some of these dreams. Just a thought. Reminded me of the dreams my husband and I dreamed when we were first married and how God has so graciosuly brought many of those dreams to fruition in ways we could never have imagined. Thank you for sharing.