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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Hotel/Motel (09/12/05)

TITLE: Lucy's Honeymoon
By Genstacia Bull
09/19/05


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Lucy was awe struck! She could not believe the beauty of the place the view from the balcony was breathtaking. The white sand next to the emerald sea was such a beautiful contrast. The whoosh of the ocean that splashed against the rocks resounded in her ears. She breathed in the air and let out a sigh of contentment and thanked the Lord silently for His goodness to her.

She twirled around and watched her beloved sleep; she thought she was in a dream. Her honeymoon suite was beyond anything she had dared dreamed. She slid into the marbled floor bathroom. When she got back upstairs, her gorgeous husband was up. He shot her a warm smile and pulled her close for a hug and asked what time was breakfast. She blushed and wriggled out of his arm and informed him he had half an hour to get ready.

They walked in for breakfast and were dazed by the variety of cereals, fresh fruits, and exotic juices. The whiff of the sausages and bacon grabbed Bradís attentions; he nodded in that direction to Lucy. They enjoyed the sea breeze and the exemplary service from the dutiful waiters.

After breakfast they went for a walk in the lush topical gardens. The fresh smell of exotic flowers and the lush green of the lawn made their walk all the more special. They talked about their dreams for their future and thanked the Lord for their union and for the privilege of such a luxurious hotel.


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Member Comments
Member Date
Jan Ackerson 09/21/05
Sounds divine! You had a run-on sentence in the 1st paragraph that could easily be fixed...and perhaps it's just me, but "...She slid into the marbled floor bathroom..." reminds me of a person sliding into 2nd base. But you did a marverlous job at depicting the beauty of a honeymoon, and implying the passion there.
Julianne Jones09/24/05
You started well, but I felt the ending could have been expanded. Perhaps rather than "They talked about their dreams for their future" you could have used dialogue to allow the reader to listen in on some of these dreams. Just a thought. Reminded me of the dreams my husband and I dreamed when we were first married and how God has so graciosuly brought many of those dreams to fruition in ways we could never have imagined. Thank you for sharing.